Happy belated Father’s Day! To celebrate, lets try to debunk the stereotype of black “deadbeat daddies.” Keep the following points in mind:
1). Contrary to popular misconception, black men are involved in the lives of their children. A study from the Center for Disease Control with a representative sample found that black men are more likely to feed, bathe, play with, and read to their children on a daily basis than men of other races.
2). According to the Pew Research Center, even when black men do not live with their children, they are still more likely to have contact with them than men of other races. 67% of black men report having contact at least once a month, in comparison to 59% of white men and 32% of Hispanic men.
3). Our understanding of what ‘counts’ as a ‘real family’ is shaped by racism, sexism, and capitalism. Many people believe that parents must biological related to the child, heterosexual, married, and living under the same roof to provide a nurturing environment. But there is a mountain of evidence that proves otherwise. While it is true that black men are less likely to marry their child’s mother and live with them, this is not – I repeat – is not synonymous with neglecting their children. It is understandable to speak from personal experience and condemn individual black males – but that does not warrant the systematic indictment of black men as a group.
4). The presence of a black man does absolutely nothing to insulate us from anti-blackness. Far too often, we hear prominent voices frame black men as a magical cure for structural problems like mass incarceration and poverty. The argument goes more or less like this: “if their father was around, they wouldn’t have this problem.” In the aftermath of the Trayvon Martin shooting, for example, President Obama created My Brother’s Keeper: an initiative to keep young (black) kids “on track” by connecting them with mentors. But this completely overlooked the fact that Trayvon’s father was in his life. Rather than have an honest discussion about America’s racist function, America prefers to perpetuate irrational and unfounded myths of black dysfunction. Besides: black people are not killed because of their ‘lack of family values’ – they are killed because they are black. Plain and simple. Dylann Roof, the white supremacist who killed 9 random people at a church in South Carolina, did so simply because they were black. He did not stop to ask them if they grew up with fathers or whether they lived with their children. He saw that they were black and that was it.
So please stop burdening black men with an undue amount of transformative power.
June 19, 2017 at 2:54 pm
I typed four paragraphs in answer to this post. Then I realized there is not enough room for my opinion here. Read my latest post, hopefully, you will enjoy it. I kinda wished you had ended the post the same way you began, with a happy thought.
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June 19, 2017 at 3:08 pm
Hi Miss Elva! I open with Happy thoughts to bait people, lol. I do not, generally, believe we live in a happy world. Death is the last chapter for everyone – one would call me a pessimist, I would say I am realistic.
Feel free to post your full opinion. And I will read your latest post!
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June 19, 2017 at 3:18 pm
Yea, in my group of friends they say “None of us are going to get out of here alive”.
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June 19, 2017 at 3:18 pm
Lol!!! I like that
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June 19, 2017 at 7:40 pm
me too!
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June 19, 2017 at 7:43 pm
Yes! Great post! But of course the masses believe whatever is fed to them on a regular basis.
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June 20, 2017 at 7:40 pm
Hello Kelley,
Thank you! Exactly, you are right. The deadbeat black father narrative is oh so powerful. People love tuning in to Maury and seeing black men denying their parental responsibilities. People love hearing songs with similar content. These studies challenge that. Their denial is an attempt to maintain the familiar, smh.
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June 20, 2017 at 11:49 pm
Right, that negativity is what they want you to believe. And it can be very impactful if negative images are the only images of Black men that impressionable minds intake.
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June 23, 2017 at 9:26 am
Great connection to the fallacy of President Obama’s initiative and the fact that Trayvon’s dad was in his life, in fact he was visiting him. I’d never even thought about that.
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August 13, 2017 at 11:44 pm
Thanks for debunking those myths with solid facts. This is why I love your blog so much cause you back up your shit. Granted, people can have a difference of opinion but they got to come with their research (which sadly, most people don’t do).
http://www.tunisiajolyn.com
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August 14, 2017 at 1:05 pm
Thank you! I agree, people need to be forthcoming about their sources. We don’t get to just make claims that are not backed by empirical reality. You need to have receipts. That is exactly why we live in the age of “fake news” – because everyone is just making unsubstantiated claims and folks are running with it. Mind boggling!
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August 14, 2017 at 2:27 pm
Also, no one is questioning what the “facts” are but don’t get me started because I think half of the mainstream stories are fake and/or orchestrated to produce fear at the perfect times.
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